The month of June was a tough one for me, folks. Usually when summer begins, I am filled with such zest and vitality. It's the kind of energy which I'm thankful to say, comes from an overall healthy lifestyle and a regular exercise regime. My job allows me a life of purpose and passion. People rely on me for creativity, motivation and inspiration. And I'm more than happy to administer my abundant enthusiasm for good living. But honestly, there are days when I need a 'booster shot' from others, and it isn't always readily available.
Without going into any detail, I had an incident in the workplace a few weeks ago, which I had to lodge a complaint for. It was something that caused me a great deal of anguish, because I had to talk to the 'higher-ups' and report unusual behaviour from a man I've known for decades. He's not my friend--he's merely an acquaintance. Even so, it was something that I needed to do to ensure that it would never again happen. And because I spoke up, it worked.
When faced with a stressful situation, most people cower, hide and harbor painful emotions. Anger and fear ensue. Not me! After going through a decade of anger and fear, I've had more than my fill. I want a life of tranquility. And I realized in time, that it's an inside job.
Not a lot of people know this, but I have a temper that tends to match my hair color--BLAZING RED. If left unattended, it can scorch anyone in its path. I no longer wish to injure, harm or make judgements. I want to inject passion and happiness into people's veins. I'm the type of person who needs to keep her anger 'in-check', regularly and often. I used to burn bridges and now, I just want to construct them.
Sometimes, life throws us curveballs and we have to react. Most folks are emotional creatures, and wear their hearts on their sleeves. I am one of those people. I used to put on such a cool front, so the outside world couldn't see my anguish and desperation. I had a hard time liking myself for the longest time. And after many years of experimentation and making lots of mistakes, I finally found my flow.
Life is not easy. It is hard. It is the toughest road you will ever travel. And no one gets out alive. Remember that YOUR happiness is never dependant on something else or someone else. You have to genuinely LOVE who you are, or no one else will. For ten years, I hated myself. I didn't like what I was doing, how I was speaking, who I was attracting, where I was going. And I couldn't figure out why I was losing friends, losing motivation and losing my mind.
But guess what? I changed. People CAN change. Not everyone, mind you, but most. I wanted to change, as challenging as it was for me. I had a deep desire for a different perspective and a fresh outlook. I needed to come to grips with the fact that the road of life would sometimes be paved with difficulty and strife. And we all have to roll with the punches and occasionally 'bite the bullet'. Through thick and thin, good and bad, pretty and ugly....
If there's something troubling you right now as you read my words, let me ask you this: Why are you holding onto it? Is there a resolution that can be reached? Can you speak your mind and open up to a good friend or family member about it? And if not, WHY NOT?
Fear is a killer. It will mess you up, every single time if you let it. If you change your thinking and allow fear to trickle through your system anyway, you will make it clear to the other side. YOU WILL. You must believe in your ability to persevere and shine through.
To cap off, I wanted to share this expression that I've heard and even uttered many times in my life. It's quick, accurate and a little blunt, so, pardon me:
SHIT OR GET OFF THE POT. DO WHAT YOU NEED TO DO, AS PAINFUL AND UNCOMFORTABLE AS IT MAY BE, TO BE THE HAPPIEST, HEALTHIEST, MOST ABUNDANT AND SELF-ASSURED PERSON YOU KNOW.
DO IT.
